Wednesday, October 05, 2005

You will read a title

I have never put much stock in horoscopes, fortune cookies, or the like. At the same time, I do enjoy the very "enlightening" predictions such as "Trouble will come your way", "Seek help from friends", or "Your life will change". It doesn't particularly take any foresight to make any of these claims. However, the last fortune cookie I got had different sort of message. It states, and I quote “You will be advanced socially, without any special effort on your part." Without any special effort...wow. This fortune cookie being a bit of an aberration it makes me wonder if the restaurant has taken to making their own fortunes to spice them up a bit. If so I want to know how I can get a job writing fortunes. It really wouldn't be that hard. The trick is to tell people exactly what they want to hear and throw in the phrase "without any special effort on your part." America is getting fatter and fatter statistically speaking so "You will lose weight, without any special effort on your part" could be really popular. Never mind that this weightloss process is referred to as decomposition, it'll happen soon enough, and without any special effort on your part.

2 comments:

Mantis said...

I've always wanted that job, too! The last time I had Chinese food my friend and I got the most bizarre fortunes.
His said: A nice cake is waiting for you.
And mine said: It tastes sweet.
I always wondered, if we'd had more cookies, if we could have written a story... :)

Heidi said...

I got a fortune cookie at the beginning of last year that said, "You will be married in less than a year." I wasn't even dating anybody at the time but sure enough, 11 months later I was married. How freaky is that? Hmmm...